Weakness
by boredBRAIXEN
Summary: TRIGGER WARNING ikarishipping One Shot


Ikarishipping

"Dawn I don't know what else to do. I'm at my end, I... I can't help him, I don't know how."

I was sitting on Reggie's back porch drinking freshly squeezed lemonade and snacking on macarons. My Pokemon were running around in the yard with the other Pokemon he had in his care. A cream colored fox Pokemon with many tails sat next to me. Pauls Ninetails had taken a liking to me.

Paul.

He's the reason I was there. I was in Unova visiting my friend Iris when Reggie called me in a panic. I dropped everything and flew straight to Veilstone. Reggie was like a brother to me and he needed my help so I didn't hesitate. But when I arrived I found out the problem wasn't my kind friend but his cold hearted brother Paul.

I sighed internally. Carefully thinking over what I was going to say. After a moment I decided how I wanted to go about this.

"So Paul is upset about... something... and hasn't spoken, slept, eaten, or even trained in the last few weeks. Why do you think I can help?"

Reggie looked at me and handed me a white envelope. I was shocked to see he was crying. I took the letter out of the envelope and began to read it.

To whomever finds this letter,

First and foremost let me extend my apologies for you having to bear witness to not only my lifeless body, but my last pathetic words.

To my brother Reggie,

You shouldn't have kept that from me. I understand why you did though. It's ok. I'm sorry I ruined your life and your dreams. As for you and Maylene, I think you two belong together. Do what makes you happy brother... also please keep all my other Pokemon, let them choose weather to stay with you, get a new trainer, or go free.

To Pathetic...Ash Ketchum,

Although I can't stand you as a person in general, I have to admit that I admire you. You are a superior trainer than me. Take my Electavire, Magmortar, and Honchcrow. Tell them I'm sorry.

To the breeder...Brock Harrison,

Take my Ursarig she's ready to start breeding and stop battling.

Tell her to take care of her shiny for Her.

She'll know what I mean.

Troublesome,

I'm sorry. I was weak and pathetic. I think you should know, I never once forgot your name. It was just fun to get you all riled up. Although I think coordinating is stupid, I think you should continue. You're stronger than you think and an amazing trainer. I never missed a single one of your contests. The only thing I will tell you is to make sure you're not too busy showing off to fight during battle rounds. Because no matter how strong your Pokemon are, it doesn't matter if you don't land the moves. And you are strong dont ever let anyone tell you different. I want you to take Torterra, Weevile, Ninetails, Salamance, Frostlass, and Neidoking. I also want you to take Aggron he will protect you with his life, all of them will. I also want you to take my Sinnoh badges. I just need you to know, I love you Dawn, I always have. But I'm not good enough for you. I'm just a cold hearted bastard that no one wants around. I hope you and Ash can be happy together. You deserve all the happiness in the world. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough.

Paul

I read the letter half a dozen times before looking up at Reggie with tears falling down my face. This was Paul's suicide note. Did that mean I was too late?

"Reggie...how"

"I found it yesterday when he was sleeping. I emptied his room of sharp objects and hid all the pills in the house. He locked himself in the room and won't come out. I don't know if he's still alive or not."

"But why do you think he'll listen to me?"

"Because he loves you dawn. He respects you and your opinion."

I nodded and sighed to myself. I patted ninetails on the head before standing up and walking inside. I made my way up the stairs to the second floor of the house and walked down the long hallway to the last door on the left.

I walked on his room and was shocked. Paul was normally freakishly clean and his room was trashed. Clothes broken glass and torn papers pictures littered the floor. I didn't see him in the room and was about to walk out when I heard sniffing coming from.the closet.

I reached out and opened the door and saw him sitting curled up in a ball with earphones in. I walked in, closed the door behind me and say down next to him. He looked up at me and then looked away. He was crying silently so I reached out and hugged him.

We sat like that for a while. He eventually ran out of energy and tears. He moved to wipe his face and when he did his sleeve moved revealing, to my horror, bright red deep cuts running up the length of his forearm.

I traced my finger lightly over the self inflicted wounds and felt tears beginning to form in my own eyes.

"Oh Paul."

He looked down in shame, refusing to meet my gaze. I couldn't take it. I couldn't risk loosing him...not again...not like this. I grabbed his face with both of my hands and crashed my lips into his. For a moment he just sat there unmoving and i felt nervous. But suddenly he closed his eyes, wrapped his arms around me and deepened the kiss.

Words can not describe the emotions poured into that kiss. Paul held onto me as if holding a life preserver, he kissed me like it was the only way he could breathe. Eventually we did need to breathe so we reluctantly broke apart.

"Paul...I love you, I always have. Please, don't do this. You mean everything to me, even more than contests and pokestyling. I would be lost without you in this world. I need you."

"No you don't. You think you do but you have no idea. You don't need anyone. You're strong, smart, beautiful, trustworthy, kind, and most importantly an amazing Pokemon trainer. I'm just a cold hearted bastard that was never even meant to be born. I ruined my parents lives, I ruined Reggie's life, disappointed him by not being strong enough to beat Brandon, I can't allow myself to ruin your life too, you'd be better off without me. I'm no good."

"You're wrong! You didn't ruin anything Paul!"

We had been so lost in our conversation that neither of us noticed Reggie walk in. He looked absolutely heartbroken.

"Otōto, you don't know what happened, how could you, you were so young...Our father used to beat our mother on a regular basis. He had many affairs, a gambling and drinking problem as well. One day mother took me and left. We stayed at a friend of hers house. We were there for about a year, father went to rehab and begged for another chance. Mother gave him one. By that time she was already pregnant with you. At first father said he understood. A month or two before you were born, he started drinking again. When mother returned from the hospital he was drunk. He beat mother senseless. Shinji had to come save her. He defeated father in a battle and banished him from.our home. It killed mother to see father like that, to the point that she could no longer stand it. When you were 6 I received a call from Shinji to come home. Mother had taken her own life. I had a choice. Stay and care for you or leave you in a state home until Shinji could gain custody of you. I chose the former and I've NEVER once regretted my decision. I was disappointed when you lost to Brandon, but not because of you. I was disappointed in myself for not telling you all of this sooner. If you knew what that man was, you would've beaten my father, the pyramid king Brandon. I could never be disappointed with you, not the way you think. You're my Otōto, and I love you. Please don't make me go through that pain again."

Reggie hugged Paul and the three of us all began to cry. After a few minutes I figured out what to do.

"What is Shinjis surname?"

Reggie smirked at me looking like Paul as he did so..."Otawata, his name is Shinji Otawata. He lives in the Vietniro region. His hometown in Poniun."

I looked at him and he gave me a nod. He already knew my plan and gave his approval. I turned to Paul and grabbed both of his hands.

"Look at me."

Paul slowly raised his head until his grey eyes met my own.

"Let's go to Vietniro. Just you and me. Together."

I was pleading with my eyes, hoping he would say yes. He needs to meet his father, maybe he can help. He nodded silently and i let out a sigh of relief, along with Reggie. He excused himself but not before saying so only I could hear...

"Take care of him. He needs you."

I nodded in reply and he exited the room closing the door behind him. I looked at Paul and spoke a final time.

"I need you to promise me you'll stop this." Pointing to his wrists as I spoke, I continued with my mini lecture..."don't ever think you're not good enough because you're more than that. You're amazing. Cunning, quick thinking, intelligent, strong, brave, loyal, you're a man of principle, no nonsense, get it done kind of person, not to mention you're fun to look at." I said the last part with a playful wink to which paul replied by smiling.

Good I was cracking his shell. I knew right then and there, I could save him, I could help him, and he would love me as much as I've always loved him.

"Seriously, if you ever think you're not good enough just talk to me about it. You're important to me Paul, I don't know what I'd do if I lost you. Can you promise me that?"

"I promise troublesome. But you have to tell me something right here and now."

I waited and noticed his cheeks heating up.

"You'll stay with me in Vietniro?"

"Yes."

"You won't give up on me? You won't leave me?"

"Of course not!"

"You said you loved me, did you mean that?"

"I...I did, yes Paul, I do love you, I think I always have. I just didn't realize it until I thought I would loose you forever."

"Then I have one final question before we go on this journey."

"Ask me anything."

"Will...you...be...ugh..."

He got frustrated as he lost his words and instead walked up to me and kissed me again. This time it was forced, full of want and desire. I knew what he wanted. He was afraid to ask. As we broke apart he whispered a single word that sent chills down my spine.

"Mine."

I looked at him and smiled. I moved to place my lips by his ears and whispered in return...

"Yours...only yours...forever."

"I love you troublesome."

"I love you Paul."

Listening from the outside of the door Reggie stood up and smiled while wiping s tear from his eye.

"He's going to be ok mother. You'd like Dawn, she's so much like you. Hell be ok thanks to her, he's finally opened his heart to someone." He bowed to his mother's pictures hanging in the hall in front of his brothers room before heading down the stairs to get their supplies ready for them for their trip.


End file.
